May I never miss a sunset or rainbow because I am looking down.
~Sara June Parker
I'm going through something. Not really sure what. Having a hard time sleeping.
I've been trying to make a conscience effort to cherish life. It's so short.
When I'm frustrated with the boys, I try to remind myself they will not always be little and soon will be out in this world on their own. I think about Manuel, already out in the world and I worry. I guess after you lose a child to murder, you never truly get over the fear. I pray for him every night.
While laying in bed with Fonzy, I pray to God that I die before him. No matter how bad he gets on my nerves at times, I don't want to be in this world without him. Been thinking about death/dying. I want to see Samuel, my Mom and I look forward to that, but praying it doesn't happen too soon.
See....told you I was going through something. Not really sure what. Just trying to live my life as best I can, enjoying the little every day moments....you know, like a sunset.