Friday, January 1, 2010

January 1 - a new year

Texas Christmas 09 013

We went to the cemetery today. While driving there I start to feel sick to my stomach. I do not like coming here. I hate the thought of Samuel lying in the ground. I stand looking at his grave, picturing his body in the casket, under my feet. I try to remember the good times, his voice, his smile, the boy he was, and the man he was becoming and feel cheated. All I have is this and I hate it….hate having to visit my son at a cemetery and thinking of what could have been.

Not a good way to start off the New Year.

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