Wednesday, May 23, 2012

3 Years Gone

samuelbdaycollage

Today marks 3 years since you've been gone.

3 years since I got the phone call that you were taken from us.

3 years of heartache

3 years of missing you

3 years of tears

3 years of wondering why

After 3 years I still find it hard to look at your pictures. My heart breaks knowing there will never be any more pictures of you.

After 3 years, I'm living day by day, putting on a smile, but inside I still struggle. When alone, I cry thinking of you, of how you were killed. I try to think of the life you lived, the good memories, but somehow I always end up on May 23, 2009. The day you lay in a parking lot, shot and killed on a dare.

No one knows the pain I still feel. I keep it to myself. I dream of you, miss you, will never forget you, and will never, ever stop loving you my first born son. I carry you in my heart, always and forever, until the day I can see your smiling face again.

samuel

5 comments:

Pretty Mades said...

:( So sad. I'm so sorry you had to go through that. I can't even imagine what it must feel like to lose a child and I hope I never do (((hugs)))

kristieinbc said...

I am so very sorry for your pain.

SnuggleBunnie said...

Can I just give you a big huge hug. If you need to lean on me I am here for you hun.

Nicky said...

Praying for you today. ((hugs))

Jennifer R. said...

Thank you and God Bless you for sharing such an intimate part of your life. I cannot know how hard this must be on you and your family, but the courage you show by expressing your emotions for others to see is amazing.
Although no words can take away the pain you feel, I am so truly sorry for your loss. I stumbled upon your Blog through a link on another knitting blog, and reading your blog touched my heart. You and your family have been in my thoughts and prayers every day since...