Daddy

I don't know how to express what I'm feelin' right now. I can't believe you're gone. There are so many things I wanted to say...so many things I wanted to tell you, but never did. And now it is too late. Daddy, even though you were not my biological dad, you were always daddy to me. I always longed for a close father/daughter relationship, but it just never seemed to happen. I know growing up I always felt like you didn't love me. But now that I am an adult, I see how you did love me, but maybe just didn't know how to show it. I know the strain of mommy being sick while we were still so young must of been hard for you. I'm sure at times you didn't know what you were going to do. I can only imagine how you felt once she died and you had the responsibility of raising three kids. I wish I had gotten up the courage to tell you that no matter what our differences were and that even though I left, I still loved you and appreciated the childhood you gave me. Of course it took me many years to see it and I hate that now I'm saying coulda, shoulda, woulda, when I should of just told you I loved you when you were here to hear it........