Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Today I buried my first born son

Samuel

Today I buried my oldest son, Samuel Rodriguez Jr....he was only 19.

I never thought I would be buring my son, this is something that always happens to someone else, but never me. My son was shot and killed Saturday, May 23, while trying to help a girl who was getting beat up.

I thought I could sit and type this, but I can't.......

36 comments:

Tanyetta said...

NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm so sorry to hear of this. This is so unfair. :(

She Needs said...

Sorry for your lost. My condolences to you and your family

Anonymous said...

babydoll we are here for you anything any of you need just let us know we weep with you.

Love,
Jay and Vicki

Susan Sutton said...

Take everything easy girl...one day at a time! Things will get better. Just remember God doesn't give you anything you can't handle! I love you and will do anything I can to help.

Isolated Existence. said...

Just read this, I sent you an email.

Anonymous said...

Oh my God Isaida. I am so sorry. I can't believe that. I know there is nothing I can say to make you feel any better but I hope you and your whole family get thru this tragedy. I am so sorry girl. He didn't deserve that. That's awful. No mother should ever go thru this either. If there is is anything you need, to chat, whatever, you have my number. I know I live far but if u just need a person to vent, I'm here for you. I am so sad for you.

I'm sending you my deepest condolences and my prayers. May he rest in peace.

Lisa

becky @ misspriss said...

Oh, no. I am so, so very sorry for your loss. You'll be in my thoughts and prayers.

JayJack said...

This is truly a tragedy. Something so senseless. Just stay focused on the Lord he does not make mistakes! Just try and take comfort in the fact that you will be reunited again. For we are in the last hours of the last days. I love you and you are in my prayers.

J.

grouptherapy said...

I am so sorry! You are in my thoughts and prayers!

Mary

Anonymous said...

Saida,

The pain I feel is immense, yet I can not imagine the pain you and Sam feel at this time. I met Samuel when he was 8 year old. He was a very opinionated and confident kid from the start. As he grew, his self-confidence allowed him to be very ambitious and opened the doors for Samuel to dream big. I loved that about him. Samuel spent every minute of his life pursing his dreams. Guess he “lived like he was dying.”

When Samuel was small, I remember throwing him around in the swimming pool. He and Manuel enjoyed that! I remember how he was obsessed with WWF Wrestling and how good of a baseball player he was. I will always remember taking Samuel to get haircuts and to play basketball. I will always remember attempting to answer all of his curious questions and trying to teach him how to drive. I will never forget the night Samuel was baptized and the night we scared him and Manuel to the point of absolute silence. Wish we had both of those events on video. Ultimately, I will never forget the final conversation I had with Samuel. That conversation is the only thing that gives me comfort during this difficult time.

You carried Samuel for 9 months and gave birth to him. You cared for him during his sleepless nights and changed his soiled diapers. You had your own dreams for Samuel when you held him for the first time. You cried with him when he was hurt and prayed for him when you could not help.

Take comfort in knowing that Samuel now rest with the God of Heaven and Earth! Find joy in that he has met his grandmother for the first time! Have hope that you will see Samuel again when God brings you home. Until then, I will be here when you need to cry or when you what to look at pictures and talk about him. I will hold your hand on the worst days and be by your side on the best. I pray that God eases your pain and guides our family during this troublesome time. I love you with all that I am.

Your Soulmate,

Fonzy

Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah said...

I am so so so sorry for your loss.

Y said...

I can't even begin to find the words. I'm so very sorry.

Jill said...

I'm so sorry for your loss!

Redneck Mommy said...

I am so very sorry for you loss.

I buried my youngest son three years ago and I know what pain you speak of.

My condolences to you and your family.

Leprakans said...

I am so sorry for your lost.... You are in my thoughts and prayers...

Burgh Baby said...

I am so very sorry for your loss.

Marla Taviano said...

I am so, so sorry. Praying for God to wrap His arms around you and comfort you during this painful time.

NotAMeanGirl said...

I followed a link from Twitter here. I am horrified that your son is gone... especially in that manner. Trying to do good. My prayers are with you. I know it does little if anything to ease your pain.

Ali said...

i am so sorry. so sorry.
HUGS!

Type (little) a said...

I don't even know you and I am crushed. This is incomprehensible. I don't expect it to give you any comfort, but your boy died a hero. My sincerest condolences.

Anne said...

I found your blog from Y @ Joy Unexpected.

My prayers are with you. I can't even fathom your sadness.

Anne
Oak Ridge, TN

Mandee - I Think You Should said...

I am terribly sorry for such an incomprehensible loss. You will be in my prayers.

frannie said...

My prayers are going out to you and your family. Know that God is right there carrying you through, keeping you strong when you are weak. *hugs*

kat said...

I am so sorry for your loss. What a horrible thing, being taken so violently when he was trying to do something good. I hope you are able to find comfort in the fact that he must have been a very fine young man to willingly put himself in harm's way to help a fellow human being. Sounds like you raised him right. {{{{{HUGS}}}}}

Susan said...

I am so very sorry, dear one. I cannot even imagine it.

Wordnerd said...

Here via Yvonne (Joy Unexpected) and as a mom of a teenage boy -- I cannot even begin to imagine your level of pain. I will pray for you and your family. God bless you.

Sarah said...

So so sorry this has happened to you and your family. Just prayed for you.

Sara said...

I am so sorry for your loss. So very very sorry. You and your family will be in my prayers.

capello said...

I cannot even comprehend what you and your family are going though, I am so very sorry for your loss.

DeeDee said...

Isaida my heart breaks for you and your family. I will keep you in my prayers. I am so very sorry for your lost.

Beautifulone71 said...

Isaida and Family,

For 9 months we prepare, pray and anxiously await the arrival of our precious bundles of joy. When they arrive we discretely count their fingers and toes relieved that everything is where it should be. We dress them up in cute little outfits and show them off to as many people as will listen or indulge us flipping through pictures. We encourage them to speak discernable words which they’ve done at warp speed many times only to hold that treat when someone else is sight. We are there when they get their teeth and first haircut attempting to preserve the occasion by saving a lock of their hair and of course snapping many pictures. We teach them to walk while secretly desiring to hold on to the days when they needed us to hold their heads up and nurse them. We privately cry on their first day of school, are elated when they graduate elementary, fear for them when they go to middle school and want to trade them in when they become teenagers. There will be many more milestones we will usher them through in preparation for adulthood And when they reach the time when they must leave the nest, we will ponder all of the moments that led up this one. We will question whether we nurtured them enough, taught them to manage their money, prayed enough and most importantly loved them enough. We never even consider the possibility that their departure will be permanent. So how then can we ever really say “good-bye” to this special one, our seed and our legacy? They are not supposed to go first. No words can diminish the pain you must feel right now. But know, God is still on the throne. After I spoke to you on Saturday, my heart broke and I pained remembering all of our conversations, worry, stress, hopes, dreams, happiness and pride we shared over the years regarding our children and family. I remembered how you worried about Samuel and his passion to produce beats instead of continuing his education, while I worried about my daughter who had become defiant and taken to running away. With each issue, one thing was clear, we resolved to lean on God to both direct their paths and help us cope. Today is another of those days when we will have to lean on God, not for understanding but for strength and courage to help us in our loss. I pray that Samuel’s death will not be in vain but that through him someone will give their life to Christ, someone will turn from a life of crime and violence, a daughter will return home and leave an abusive relationship and parents will keep vigil over their children day and night. No day is promised to any of us but be encouraged because Samuel knew he was loved and he knew Christ. He saw his parent’s praying and I’m certain he is with his “Heavenly Father”. I thank God for Fonzy and the boys; they will be your angels here on earth. I will continue to pray with you and for you guys. God’s mercy and grace be with you and yours all the days of your lives. I am too am only a call away.

Love
Taunia

Tammy and Rob said...

My prayers are with you, I am so very sorry for your loss!

NYCity Mama said...

I just saw your tweet! I'm so, so sorry for your loss! May he rest in peace. My heart goes out to you and your family. I'm so terribly sorry.

Carol

Anonymous said...

HI ISAIDA...I KNOW ITS HARD BUT AT LEAST HE DOSNT HAVE TO SUFFER ANY LONGER...I LOVED SAMUEL SO MUCH...HE WAS A GOOD PERSON..HE WILL ALWYS BE REMEMBERED!!!!!!!!I REMEBER THE FIRST TIME I MET HIM I WAS SOOO SCARED OF HIM...I DNT EVEN KNOW WHY N THEN I GOT TO KNOW HIM N I JUS THOUGHT HE WAS SOMEBODY I LOOKED UP TO AND I ALWAYS WILL. HE HELPED ME THREW MY HARD TIMES WITH MANUEL N I JUS ALWAYS THOUGHT OF HIM AS MY BIG BROTHER!!!THE THING I LOVED ABOUT HIM WAS THAT HE WASNT SCARED TO BE HIMSELF HE DDNT CARE WAT ANYBODY THOUGHT OF HIM!!!!HE WAS AMAZING!!I HOPE YOU ARE DOING BETTER...IM HERE IF YOU NEED TO TALK...I MISS MY "MOTHER DAUGHTER" TALKS WE HAD!!! LOVE YOU, NICOLE

jai said...

I am so sorry for your loss. I can't imagine how you must be feeling right now. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Marcela said...

I just found your blog and have been reading all your posts.

How hard this must be for you. I am so sorry. I can not imagine being in your shoes.

Sending good thoughts your way. I felt your post, they are so real, and enjoyed seeing the pictures.

Looking forward to more,
Marcela