The Birth of Samantha Isaida - my namesake!

Happy 2016!

We are well into the New Year and even though I had good intentions of posting before now, it just didn't happen. But I'm here now!

The holidays were great. We took a road trip to Texas and I got a late Christmas present. Another Grandbaby! She was named after my oldest son who passed away and myself! She was due December 20, but held on for me to arrive in Texas and was born on December 27th.

Miss Samantha Isaida
My son and his girlfriend, Kaily


Having a baby is hard work!


Samantha's first breath!


Samantha and her other Grandma


Hi Daddy :)


Our first selfie!


It was such an amazing experience being there for Samantha's birth. I wasn't there for my other 2 grandbabies birth. It happened to be our last day in Texas and one of the coldest days with freezing rain and snow.

As I watched Manuel comb Kaily's hair, hold her hand, and comfort her during contractions, I remembered the baby he once was. It was so hard to believe he was having his 3rd baby! I wanted to capture every moment. Watching Samantha come into the world and take her first breathe took my breathe away. Watching someone give birth is so different from experiencing it yourself. I will never forget it. And to be at the birth of a grandbaby who has my name, makes it even more special. I hated we had to leave the next morning.

Welcome to the world Miss Samantha Isaida! We love you so much already!

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Sidenote: A few years ago when I first got my DSLR camera I came across birth photographer blogs and thought to myself "I would LOVE to do that!" To be there when this miracle of life happened. I was slightly obsessed and would read blog after blog of birth photography. The pictures were always so amazing! On this visit to Texas I forgot my big camera at home. My son and I couldn't believe I didn't have it for this event. Thank God for iPhones! All the pictures were taken with my iPhone. Being there, witnessing this miracle bought back the desire to be a birth photographer. To bear witness to this all the time. I can't even put into words how amazing that would be.

Happy 2nd Birthday Lil Miss Carmen!

Happy Birthday to the prettiest Grandbaby EVER! My little Carmen!

I can't believe she is 2! Here's the post from the day she was born.

Carmen - Grandma, Fonzy and your Uncles miss and love you!

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

Grown Son, Little Uncles, and Grandbabies

You know one of the good things of having a grown son? Having someone else cook! Manuel doesn't mind cooking and his second night here, he made us chicken and steak fajitas. They were good! He even set the table. I can't remember the last time I set the table. We normally just grab a plate and sit down. He cooked a few times while he was here and cleaned the kitchen almost every night for me.

Another good thing of having a grown son, he can drive and run errands for me! It was great when I needed something from the store and I didn't have to go. I could just send him!

I miss him.....and not just for the cooking, cleaning and errand running.....but I sure do miss that too!


This was Elijah and Ezekiels first time seeing their little neice and nephew. Uncles at 10 and 12! Carmen loved Ezekiel and Elijah. She liked playing with Elijah and he was always willing to play with her.

When Ezekiel came home the day they left, he said the house seemed empty and was too quiet. I guess he got use to the crying and screaming. Carmen can definitely scream! I gave her the nicname of Screaming Mimi!



Before the Grandbabies arrived, I wanted to have another baby. I thought 41 wasn't too old to have another, right? Wrong! I am too old for babies! I forgot how much work they are! They are little cuties, but it's good to be able to hand them over to their parents when they are crying and screaming or need diaper changing! Or when Grandma needs a nap!

Grandma! I sometimes still can't believe I'm a Grandma! I still remember Manuel as a chunky little baby. I know as parents we all say time flies, but it really and truly does!

Hiatus, Grandbabies, Life

As you probably noticed, I took an unexpected hiatus from this space. My son, his girlfriend and my grandbabies where here visiting. I planned on taking tons of pictures, and sharing the visit, but that didn't happen.

Life happened.

There was laughter, hugs, kisses, but also arguments, long talks and tears.

They were here for 2 weeks and this morning about 4am I dropped them off at the airport with hugs, kisses, I love yous and plenty of prayers in my heart. Prayers for healing, prayers for patience, prayers for understanding, prayers for love. Prayers for life.....

Giggles

Love this picture of Jonah and Manuel....so sweet!

Smile - life is beautiful

Wow - it's October 18th already! This month is flying by.

This has always been my favorite time of year. It still is. Both Samuel and Manuel were born in October. Manuel's birthday was yesterday. He turned 21! Of course I had to give him the speech that just because you are of legal drinking age, doesn't mean you need to go out and act a fool. He called me this morning. He was suffering through work because of a hangover. My advice obviously went in one ear and out the other. He was at least smart enough to have a designated driver.

Samuels' birthday is on the 20th. He would have been 22. On his birthday I try to reminisce on all the good memories, and not the fact that he is no longer with us. I don't want his birthday to be a sad day, but a day to remember the life he had. No matter how short it was. He was here, he was loved, and I want that to be the focus of his birthday.

It's suppose to get chilly this week. The mornings have already been chilly....making it so hard to get out of our warm and cozy bed. The trees are starting to turn red, orange, yellow. I need to get out and take some pictures before they are all blown away. Been doing some baking, and loving the cozy feel of home. I'm ready to light up the fireplace and hibernate!

Lovin' October! Who's lovin' it with me?

Together Again

Being a parent is hard. Being a young parent is even harder. Manuel and Andrea had a rough year. A year apart with crying, fighting. Long phone calls with both of them, advice giving and lots of praying.

After all of that, they found their way back together again, just in time for Little Jonah to make his appearance.


It's not going to be easy. No relationship is. But I continue to pray they will beat the odds, become stronger and love each other more than ever before. Not just for them, but for Carmen and Jonah also.






And they are definitely going to need to stay strong with Carmen. I can just see her giving them a run for their money! This is the story I see in these pictures.

"Daddy, I'm driving! Look at me, I'm so cute!"

Then Manuel did or said something and she went off!

"Hey! Can't you see I'm driving and being cute! Leave me alone!"

Yep - they are going to need lots of strength and prayer!

Like Mother - Like Son

Manuel and his babies - Carmen and Jonah

I was his age (20) with 2 babies also. Not what I had planned, and I'm sure not what he had planned either. It's not easy.  The struggles of wanting to be young and carefree, but now having two little ones who totally depend on you. Every decision you make will effect them.

Daddy...a big role. I know it's been hard for him. Trying to do the right thing. Sometimes doing the right thing hurts. Sometimes you want to give up. I've been there. I understand.

I too was 20 with 2 babies - Like mother, like son.


Samuel and Manuel - my first two babies

Grandma x 2

I'm a Grandma x 2. Jonah Rodriguez was born June 21, 2011 - 6lbs 5oz.

How does it feel being a Grandma of 2 at 40yrs old? Kinda like being a Grandma of 1 at 39. I had two babies by the time I was 20 also. So I guess Manuel is following in my footsteps. He didn't listen to my advice - "Do as I say, not as I do/did!"

Welcome to the world sweet Jonah - Grandma loves you!

Remembering Budda'

May 23 was a year since Samuel was taken from us. To remember his brother, Manuel and his friends had a little ceremony at the cemetary, then headed to the place he was shot to release 325 balloons and to play his music. Mr 325(Abilene's area code) is what Samuel called himself.


I would not have been able to go to the place Samuel was shot, but I'm glad Manuel and Samuel's friends were able to celebrate his life in the way they wanted. I know Manuel misses his Budda' everyday and struggles just like we all do.

Fleeting

ezekiel and elijah

This time is so fleeting! Ezekiel and Elijah, running, playing, being each other's best friend, sharing a bedroom, having whispered conversations, telling each other their secrets before they go to sleep.

Next year Ezekiel will be in middle school leaving Elijah in elementary by himself for the first time. They won't see each other in the halls, in the cafeteria, or on the playground. I wonder how their relationship will be as they get older. Will they still share their secrets and be best friends?


samuel and manuel

I think about Samuel and Manuel, how they were each other's best friends growing up. Sharing a room, playing, telling each other their secrets, just like Ezekiel and Elijah. But now Manuel is alone, without his older brother, his best friend, his secret keeper.

We all miss Samuel so much, but sometimes I think Manuel misses him most, because they had the closest relationship.....a relationship only brothers can have.

Carmen

A grandmother is a mother who has a second chance. ~Author Unknown


Grandmother-grandchild relationships are simple. Grandmas are short on criticism and long on love. ~Author Unknown



If your baby is "beautiful and perfect, never cries or fusses, sleeps on schedule and burps on demand, an angel all the time," you're the grandma. ~Teresa Bloomingdale

Manuel and Carmen

She's already changing and I haven't even seen her yet! I hate that they are so far away!

The birth of Carmen