Thursday, May 27, 2010
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
May 23 was a year since Samuel was taken from us. To remember his brother, Manuel and his friends had a little ceremony at the cemetary, then headed to the place he was shot to release 325 balloons and to play his music. Mr 325(Abilene's area code) is what Samuel called himself.
I would not have been able to go to the place Samuel was shot, but I'm glad Manuel and Samuel's friends were able to celebrate his life in the way they wanted. I know Manuel misses his Budda' everyday and struggles just like we all do.
Monday, May 24, 2010
Susan, Juanita and Me - cira 1998
Twelve years ago, I met Susan. We were co-workers and when we first met, we couldn't stand each other! We worked in the HR office together and our manager told us we better learn to get along or we would both be without jobs. So we decided to act like we liked each and 12+ years later, we are the best of friends!
Even though I'm here in NC and she is in TX it hasn't changed our friendship. It's just a long distance one. When I was in Texas for Samuel's funeral, she never left my side. We talk and text every. single. day.
A few months ago, I found out Susan was pregnant. She had been keeping it a secret! Even from her momma! She knew we would get on her about having another baby when she has 3 already and being a single mom now. I can't tell you how many lectures I've given her.
The baby was due in July, but she started having complications and went to the hosptial. They ended up sending her to the hospital in Odessa in a helicopter. Odessa is two and half hours from her home, so she didn't have anyone there with her, unless the baby's father, Lupe visited her. I was her outlet. We texted all day everyday. I would send her pictures of what I was doing through out the day. What I was cooking, etc. And she would send me pics of her days at the hospital.
She texted her whole helicopter ride.
A belly shot in the hospital bathroom.
The highlight of her day was to go outside in the park at the hospital to feed the birds. She would save her bread to give them. The nurses even bought her a little gift.
The horrible hospital food
Lounging in bed with her feet up.
After being in the hospital for a month or so on bedrest they sent her home, but it didn't last long. I think a week or so later, she was back in hospital and had little Maya 2 months early.
Maya and her Daddy's hand
Maya and Mommy
Maya and Daddy
kisses from mommy
Maya and her brother and sisters - Miana, Mello, and Katalina.
Sometimes I look at Elijah and I see Samuel. He has little looks that remind me of Samuel and he sometimes even acts like him. I catch these glimpses of Samuel and I think about his life, our relationship and how in his last few months here on earth we were growing closer. He would call me for no reason at all, just to chit chat. That wasn't the norm, but it was slowly becoming the norm and then he was gone.
Yesterday was a year since Samuel was taken from us. A year....
When the boys frustrate me, I try to remind myself that I shouldn't sweat the small stuff. That the time I have with them is precious and so fleeting.
Elijah, my last baby is growing up so fast. But right now, he still wants to hug on me, be close to me and I try to capture those moments because I never know when it will be for the last time.
Take me out with the crowd
Buy me some peanuts and cracker jack
I don't care if I never get back
Let me root, root, root for the home team
If they don't win it's a shame.
For it's one, two, three strikes, you're out, At the old ball game."
Friday, May 7, 2010
It's baseball season and for the first time Ezekiel and Elijah are playing on the same team and Fonzy is coaching them. I'm the official cheerleader and photographer. It's a family affair.
The games so far have been exciting. We started out on a winning streak, but for some reason the boys seem to be losing their mojo. They start out great, but if the other team starts scoring, our boys lose confidence and it's downhill from there.
Sometimes the youngest one on the team get's so discouraged that all he can do is cry. But he picks himself up, goes out on the field and tries again.
Sometimes you just need a little pep talk from the coach.
In the dugout, behind the chainlink fence you watch your teammates up to bat, anxiously awaiting your turn, hoping you at least hit the ball, and secretly hoping for homerun!
And sometimes your teammate gets one and you all share in his joy and hope the next one is yours!